Cranky Old Goth.

I know I’m always cranky, but bear with me, I’m a chubby ass Old Goth and I got beef.

Like many wise Old Goths I know better than to be mad when dark styles come back around again. The thing that makes it great is that a lot of stuff becomes accessible and affordable. A lot of us chunky ass Old Goths magically have more choices to stock up on.

So if you’ve seen there is a huge Witchy Occulty dark aesthetic happening all over and I’m here for it.

Now let me reminisce about some good old days, circa let’s say ’95 to, uh, let’s say 2005 or so.Back in the day as we Olds like to call it, we had a pretty good selection of Goth shit. Sturdy shit. Shit, I could pack my ass into between the sizes of let’s say 8-18.

It was a great fucking time.

Now cut to now, 2016.

Today I was doing some browsing and wow, damn if I didn’t have a flashback to being a baby size 14 fatty and only being able to look at purses and shoes with my friends.

One one hand FUCK YES give it ALL to me in Black and spooky but god damn.


I fell in absolute love with this dress from Dolls Kill.  I mean I fell ASS over tea kettle in love with it. I have a 20$ gift card for Dolls Kill in my purse and I was 99% sure I could order it next week with money from one of my side hustles.

But, because I’ve been a fatty for a long time and Alt clothing has turned from pretty stuff for ALL the booties to maybe if you’re pretty skinny and tall-I emailed.

I will say that their CS was very fast and polite. I do like how their stuff is worded. I feel like if I could be their customer, I’d I’d be their babe. That said that size range for pieces like that is reported as 0-8.




I will say that I’ve seen a good number of folks outside of that size range who would probably clamor to buy stuff in that style, or in lots of other styles carried in that shop (things that aren’t shoes or accessories) but..seriously?

Okay so….obviously I and folks like me and fat folks are not their customer. And really I knew it going in (looking at their models/aesthetics) but god damn it I really wanted that dress.

I decided to have another look around and frankly I’ve found two shops with the witch bitch occulty I don’t give a fuck aesthetic I love that even tries to cater to more than thin folks.

Have a looksy through this shop. It’s not exactly the same aesthetic but a fat bitch can get there at this store. Look through and look at their models. Look at the looks.

I’ve said it for years but honestly, really?

It is 20-motherfucking-16.

Can more indie flavored shops start helping a fat bitch out?

I want my ass in some hot witchy attire that isn’t necessarily Ren Faire worthy (not that I don’t love that I do but come on, I need variety), I want to stop with this “Alt” culture that is really only pretending to be an alternative.

I mean can we agree that it’s far more radical if that’s your schitck to at least TRY to serve more people than those who are a size 0-8?

One one hand, I do follow a lot of shops on Etsy etc that do some really great occulty/witch bitch style clothes. However, a lot of those are OOAK (one of a kind) or hand made to order and I do not have enough money to be buying all that kind of thing. I want to take advantage of stuff being around.

And yes, I know how to find knock offs from stores in Asia and will occasionally take the risk. I know that yes, I could find tshirts that are big and baggy but available in sizes outside of that 0-8 type but that’s not what I want.

I want skater dresses/skirts that are longer than bum covers. If I want a bum cover (A beef many of my fellow Old Goths has had with, ahem, Lip Service)  I’ll buy a bum cover.

I want the flexibility in a garment that might be baggy on a very thin person and might be less baggy on a not thin person.

And nope let’s not blame the manufacturers. Let’s not blame fat folks for not buying.

Fat people will buy if it is available. I will do some free ass market research right now.

If you go to any basic fatty store, you’ll see a lot of expensive poly office wear and tents and shit.

Now if fat folks (and others who are not thin) will pay for that, we’ll pay for stuff with a real aesthetic. Even an Alt one.

Think I’m joking?

Take a poll on social media and spread the word. Ask if you made stuff or sought things in sizes L-above and watch the raised hands

The secret is, you can’t be like a lot of retailers and shove anyone over a size 10 into some weird we don’t want you seen in our clothes corner.

You have to do the work.

You have to make sure that the community knows you’re there.

If you feature customers, try featuring some who don’t look exactly like your professional models.

Put in the work. Reap the rewards.

You can feel like FUCK YES we did something good.

FUCK YES look at our mothafuckin bottom line!

I mean, come on y’all.

Okay, that’s it for now. I’m going to go back to fucking Hot Topic and maybe pick out a new dress. Or maybe I will try to trade my Dolls Kill gift card for someplace more welcoming of me and my ass.

AND I invite y’all to drop some links to dark, witchy stores that don’t only stock Chic Starr bullshit and have some flair and welcome my xl size ass.

And no for real follow Shop Tunnel Vision as linked above. I like them a lot and I’ve got a few things from them that were gifts and are awesome. Give them some love.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.