Adventures in Aging- Perimenopause and Meeting Crushing Fatigue

I wrote a little essay about my adventures in Perimenopause. You can check it out on Medium here.

So this will be a new feature here.

First, what is perimenopause?

This is what my browser says:

pe·ri·men·o·pause
[ˌperēˈmenəˌpôz]

NOUN

  1. the period of a woman’s life shortly before the occurrence of the menopause.

Um shortly, that is some bullshit. This can last from 5-15 years.

Currently I think I’m about in full year two or so.

Whatever.

Can we talk about the symptom they call crushing fatigue?

For the background, I’ve had sleep disorders for my entire life. I’m talking from toddlerhood on up. I’ve dabbled in about everything to help:

Things I have tried:

  • Drugs- legal and not
  • Herbs- legal and not
  • Sleep hygiene. 
  • Yoga
  • No screens/sensory input for various times before bed.
  • Giving up caffeine/any stimulant
  • White noise
  • No noise
  • Ear plugs
  • Eye masks
  • Exercising up to 3-4 hours a day and/or 2 times a day.
  • Masturbation
  • Intermittent fasting
  • Juice “cleanse”
  • Vegan diet
  • Raw diet
  • Weight loss
  • Long walks
  • Meditation
  • Alcohol
  • No alcohol
  • Not eating before bed
  • Eating before bed…

So yeah. Pretty much all the things. At worst I walk around sleep deprived enough that it would be extremely unsafe for me to drive if I did, and everything is awful. Frankly, I’m kind of used to that and I can function. It’s not always great and when things are extra special bad, my hands shake and I’m pukey and crazy.

In my research when I first saw the crashing/crushing fatigue symptom I was like, oh bitch please I got this.

Y’all….

My reproductive system was like:

bitchwat

Image of Katt Williams looking disgusted, text reads “When someone says something stupid” on top. On the bottom it says, “Bitch what?”

SO..um.

Right.

I’ve been tired. I’ve been hospitalized for exhaustion. I’ve walked (and worked) while hallucinating due to exhaustion.

I have never felt like this in my fucking life.

Some days, getting out of bed is a battle. Riding the bus, I feel like I might nod out like a junkie. I am just, so fucking exhausted.

It’s the brain fog and the body feeling like I went ten rounds with somebody.

I’m doing what I can but damn y’all.

I’m trying to do shit and my brain is like:

dump-fire-3

Photo of burning tires.

My brain is a burning tire fire.

Thus the blogging is a bit slow because I really only have the stamina for a few things.

Y’all shit is not cute.

That said. I’m dealing with other stuff fairly okay. My skin has changed and I’m working with it. I’ll make a post about that later.

I’ve started the occasional bonus periods. Spotting. Bloating, y’all the fucking random bloating. It’s a good thing I already prefer a good stretchy waistband cause shit is real.

I’ve been experimenting with my nutrition and whatnot as well. So I’m doing stuff, I don’t want to do hormone therapy.

There will be more adventures in aging posts. The next time it’ll likely be a skin post since my skin has been doing the absolute most.

 

 

 

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About Shannon Barber

I am a strange little woman who likes pie.
This entry was posted in adventures in aging, Uncategorized and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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